Reflections on motherhood...


Thursday, May 26, 2011

Puppetry of the infant penis

If you ever wondered the point at which men become obsessed with their penises, I would venture to answer: IN UTERO.  I am casting my mind back to the early tiny-baby days and I cannot really remember a time when Milkbaby's little hands did not wander to investigate his junk.

A common nappy-change-time conversation in our house:

"Ok let's just change your nappy.  Let me just get it undone...  No, get your hands out of there!  Look why don't you hold onto this? [hand over random item]
Okay, let's just get you cleaned up.  Hey, what's happened to your toy?  No, oh gosh, you really shouldn't do that to yourself.  Hey hey hey, really, I don't think it's meant to stretch like that.  Ouch, that's gotta hurt.  Just hang on, let me find you something else to play with.
Let me just finish this and put a new nappy on.  No, hands off that now.  There.  All done."

Or if DH is participating in the nappy change:

"Dude, that's really not a good idea.  Jebus buddy.  Ouch.  No really, don't do that!  Buddy, it's not a good idea to pull on it like that.  You might need it in future!"

Last night in the bath, in an effort to get a better look at things over his portly tummy, Milkbaby toppled over backwards, landing with a splash and giving himself a fright.  It didn't discourage him.

I know from conversations with other mums that Milkbaby is not alone in his obsession.

Yes we really do talk about these things.  And if we didn't have each other to talk to, I suspect we'd be posting questions on public forums like "My baby grabs his penis every nappy change.  Is this normal?".  Yes honey, it's totally normal.  Just spend five minutes people watching and you'll see grown men doing the same thing.  Or if you're really worried, just check out this article.  It will prepare you for the toddler and teenage years.  And you'll be pleasantly surprised to find out that this behaviour is not contagious.

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