Thinking, somewhat simplistically, that better eating = better sleeping, I called the Well Child nurse in desperation.
"He's not really eating that well." I said, fighting back tears.
"I'd better come for a visit, and watch you feed him. Then we can make sure his mouth is working."
"Do you have baked beans? We can give him some baked beans for lunch."
"Ahm, no, I haven't given him baked beans yet. I thought they were a bit sugary and salty."
"Well maybe scrambled eggs then. What kind of baby food are you giving him? Does it have carrots in it?"
"Um, err, (fumbling with a jar and searching for the "correct" answer), well I mostly give him homemade stuff and yes I do sometimes give him steamed carrots."
"Okay, good. It's just there's a brand of baby food that has square carrots. Babies don't like square carrots."
"Umm, right. No I don't think I've been giving him square carrots."
At this point I was thinking "SQUARE CARROTS?! I think the problem is bigger than [insert inappropriate swearwords here] square carrots!!"
And so she visited. And we watched Milkbaby:
- smush finger food
- drop things from his high chair
- blow water and food raspberries
- garrotte himself with his bib.
Then she said "have you heard of baby lead weaning?"
Given all the finger food at Milkbaby's fingertips, I just about said "yes I have, have you?" Instead, I just said "uh huh" (extreme fatigue was setting in by this point).
Finally she said "well his mouth is working fine, and he seems to know what to do - you might just try giving him three meals in the afternoon. Lunch, afternoon tea and dinner."
I smiled and nodded. It's the best response in these types of situations.