Me, to Milkbaby: "The sooner you start creche the better buddy. I'm pretty much over this motherhood caper."
DH: "You should enjoy it you know, there's not much time before he starts, and it'll go so fast."
Me: "There's nothing enjoyable about it."
Milkbaby: "AAaaeergh" (frustrated scream, translating as "would you stop trying to shove that bloody awful porridge down my throat and let me go and play on the stairs")
Me: "Yeah buddy, I feel the same way - I've had three hours sleep and now Dad's giving me a lecture on how I should be enjoying myself."
DH: "I'm not giving you a lecture."
Me: "It is a bloody lecture! Stop pushing my bloody buttons!"
Me: "Please would you eat something? Come on, it's really tasty."
And so it goes. That was breakfast.